………….

I really didn’t think it would be that easy. Granted I had some help getting in, but it’s not like I ‘m a seasoned criminal.

How uncomplicated it was to find you. Tidy little cardboard boxes, full of freshly cremated beings. I do apologise for the haphazard way in which I tipped you into an ill thought out receptacle. But to be fair zip lock lunch bags are pretty reliable.

It had taken hours of burning little piles of wood in order to perfect just the right colour and consistency of ash. Oh shit, note to self, find out how to completely clear google searches.

Anyway I’ve got you now, they can fill their perfectly picked urn, to sit on their antiquated mantle and pay homage to you as they did in life. But rest assuee my love, this is one promise they won’t be breaking.